Thursday, March 24, 2011

Thursday Shorty

Lot's of talking following last nights game, and some of it, we don't like so much.

Let's cut right too it. The effort of the Calgary Flames was called out by everybody, radio guys, print guys, TV guys, everybody. That isn't right.

Do the Flames take games off? Hells yeah they do. No question. We call them the Country Club for a reason. But so does every other team in this league. It isn't unique to the Flames.

The Flames problems have nothing to do with Heart, Leadership, Grit, Effort, Try, Manhood. None of that. The Flames issue is Talent.

Our last post had the best stat eva! on the Flames. This team does not beat good teams. It doesn't. Against Vancouver, Detroit, San Jose, and Phoenix, we managed to win two games out of seventeen. Two out of seventeen.

Did the Calgary Flames take every game they played against those four opponents off? Ludicrous. They just aren't a good team. When you say it is an effort thing, you are implying that they are a good team that just doesn't put in the effort. This isn't true. They are not a good team.

Maybe you have a problem with the 'effort' displayed last night. Maybe you didn't like the 'fight' displayed by the team. It was disconcerting, admittedly. But the answer isn't to send them to the hospital to get heart transplants. Two of seventeen implies that this team needs to get better players on it's roster.

And, as the last post also shows, we are fucked for next year when it comes to cap space unless some hard decisions are made. Hagman, Kotalik, and Stajan need to be on another teams roster when the 2011-2012 season starts. Hagman and Kotalik offer so little utility that their presence on the roster probably hurts the teams chances to win. Stajan, the same thing. Honestly, on Stajan: we paid BMo nothing, and he became our best centre option to use with Elvis and Tangs. We paid Stajan 3.5 million and he ended up being the fourth line centre. With Langkow coming back to be this clubs fourth line centre, Stajan has to go, period. JBlow didn't turn us into fans of his with his act last night. If someone would take him, that's a tonne of cap space right there. And the team would save even more money because we wouldn't have to buy him tampons anymore.

The teams operating strategy needs to change. For too long Jarome has been counted on to score 100 goals a game for this team. The days of cheaping out on support for him need to end. We need a real player to come in and play with the cat, or at the very least, we need another real player on this roster so all we have to count on Jarome for is secondary scoring.

The ownership of this team needs to drink the reality potion. Charging top dollar to see a mediocre team is going to have corrosive effects on the fanbase if it is allowed to continue for too long.

And for the love of Whalen, we need a real play by play and colour team in the booth. We don't care how many friends Loubardias and Simmer have in the media, they are boring, cliche, and unwatchable.

Anyways, here's to hoping for renewal by blood in the offseason. And the acquisition of Brad Richards.

Furthermore, I think Peter Loubardias should be fired.

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Flames Most Pressing Need: Cap Space

Look people, we are not going to sugar-coat it for you: This team stinks. We shudder to think of where it would be standings wise had it not gone on the miracle run. Stinks, is of course a subjective term; This team is quite capable of battling for the 8th, 9th, and 10th position in the conference, and for some people that level of mediocrity is alright. Those people are named Murray Edwards and Ken King, and they are wrong in their assumptions.

For most people, 'stinks' would be a perfectly acceptable description of the Calgary Flames. They are not Oiler bad, but do you really need to sink that deep into the mud of hopelessness to start acquiring a smell? No, of course not. The simple act of being mediocre in a mediocre league is enough to cause flies to gather. But before we go any further, we might as well take a real look at the team, and their stinkage:


Obviously the season isn't over yet, so sample size alert, but whatever. For this season, at this point in time, this is your Calgary Flames.

Rank refers to where the team ranks in a particular category compared to the Western Conference, and Splits refers to our convoluted practice of splitting the 15 teams into 3 groups (The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly). 1 means the team is in the top third, 2 means middle third, 3 means Oilers.

Now, if you look at that, you might think that the team isn't great, but that it doesn't necessarily stink either. Nonsense of the Alice in Wonderland variety. Because while those stats may paint the picture of a team that's middling, the following stats are even more damning evidence that they do in fact stink.


Ouch. Seriously, that is about the most damning evidence we could present about this team. Against the top dogs in the West, we have won two games. You still want to sit there and tell us that this team doesn't stink?

Because it is going to be important to establish the fact that this team isn't good enough to win a championship, whether they make the playoffs this year or not. You cannot go two wins fourteen losses against teams that the Flames would have to beat in the playoffs to win a championship and tell us everything is all right. Something is clearly not all right; the miracle second half is a mirage.

It's going to be important to establish that because the ownership group of this team may look at the second half of the season and convince themselves that everything is ok, that Darryl was right all along and they should keep this group together, even if that means having to give money and big term to a Curtis Glencross. It is important to try to kill this particular meme early because the team is not as good as their second half record suggests, and it needs upgrades, not simply to tread water.

Well, upgrades are expensive. Can the Flames afford them? For the purpose of this discussion, we are going to peg the cap at $62 million dollars. For no reason in particular, if you are wondering. The cap went up $3 million dollars last year, so that's where the increase comes from.

Applause, please:


Can ya'll read that? First off, thank glorious Heaven that D Moss is signed for next year. And Tim Jackman, Esq, provides crazy utility. Besides that, it doesn't look so good. Without resigning Tangs and Glencross, or anybody off this years roster, we would sit at about $5.7 million dollars in cap space (again, assuming a $62 million dollar ceiling, and you know where you can stink assumptions). Which isn't a lot, to be honest. We then went ahead and filled the roster with 'league minimum' contracts we valued at $600,000. That would leave the Flames with $2 million dollars in cap space. Or 2.6 if they were to swap out a minimum for a real player. Again, not a lot of money available to be throwing around.

Which is a problem, as we showed earlier. This team needs upgrades, not to simply retain this roster and hope for the best next year. It needs to buy odds, if you will, and you buy odds with talent upgrades. Talent upgrades cost money, and the Flames have money, but they also cost cap space, and the Flames don't have any of that.

So obviously we are talking about bringing in Brad Richards to play the White Knight. Let's just get right to that. What do you think that takes, 80 million over 10? An 8 million dollar cap hit? That's not going to work for this team as it is currently constructed. Which means Murray Edwards is going to have to step up to the plate.

Hagman and Kotalik have to go, and they should be made to disappear with a loan to a KHL team, because buying them out will hurt the cap. If you could loan those two players, that would give the team an additional $6 million dollars in cap space. Wanna do the math with us? 6+2=Brad Richards.

Stajan will have to go too, obviously. Brad Richards plays centre, and Stajan just pretends too. Who the hell is going to take Stajan? Easy. The Florida Panthers have only $16 million dollars in cap space committed for next year. They are going to have to add $20 million dollars in contracts just to make the bloody cap floor! Stajan for a box of Florida oranges seems like a reasonable trade to us.

And guess what we just did: we have added Brad Richards, and with kicking Stajan to the curb, we have added one of Tanguay or Glencross, too. If you were able to get rid of Sarich (which we may need to keep because we have little depth on the blueline) that would mean you could sign them both, if you were so inclined.

Anyways, you are going to hear a lot of people talk about how the Flames are in an impossible cap situation. This isn't true. We are certainly in a difficult cap situation. No question about that. But impossible? Kotalik can be sent down to the AHL, and Hagman will pass through waivers if we send him down. That means Murray will in effect pay $6 million in real dollars to create $6 million in cap space (which he will then have to fill with players), but when you are involved in an ownership group whose combined net worth is above $2 billion dollars, you can afford to do that. Getting rid of Stajan is going to be the most difficult transaction, but as we said, send his ass to Florida, as they need to spend big just to get to the floor. Those moves would create instant cap flexibility, which we can promptly burn up by offering Brad Richards $80 million dollars, or whatever it is going to take.

Bottom line: The cap flexibility is there for this team to improve itself through trade or free-agency if the ownership group doesn't cheap out, and Feaster thinks big.

Besides, for the price they are charging for tickets to watch a club that hasn't made the playoffs for two straight years, they owe it to the fans to take a big swing.

Furthermore, I think Peter Loubardias should be fired.

Monday, March 21, 2011

Argh Malarg

First, before we begin, fuck those refs. Mob have money on the game, or what?

And look, it isn't nice to bitch and moan about the referees, and we usually don't engage in that type of behaviour n the site, but seriously, fuck those referees. Those puke zebras cost us a point last night.

Actually, there is a solution to that, a way to hedge. It's called 'Win More Than Four Games In November'. It's crazy new, but it tends to allow for margin of error; Margin of error comes in handy this time of year.

Anyways...it's not all over. This team could win eight games in a row. Sure it can. But just in case the team doesn't run the table, which would be crazy impossible because the team is playing so well right now, and it doesn't make the playoffs, we have a solution to the problem.

It's called Brad Richards. After missing the playoffs for the last two years, it just might be a shiny enough bauble to buy the fans appreciation.

Let's not fuck around either folks. It's going to be a tough sled. First, we are going to have to make cap space. That means Ales Kotalik is gone, Nik Hagman is gone, Glencross and Tangs may be gone. Badsuck is definitely out of here. The franchise is going to have to trade Joker or Stajan (and if you, dear Reader, go out and slaughter enough virgins, who knows, they may be able to offload both). Staios is gone anyways, merciful God.

After all that work, then we are going to have to sign the cat. You know who else wants to sign the cat? Toronto and New York. So it's going to cost cash. Here is the thing though: The NHL is a salary capped league. Assuming the league is going to be around, and the Flames are going to be around, in ten years, then that money is already spent. In a capped league that has a salary floor, the money is spent in perpetuity. We just have yet to assign that already spent money. Assign it to Brad Richards. 8 million a year if you have too.

So yeah, that campaign has officially begun...

(we will do a real post tomorrow)

Furthermore, I think Peter Loubardias should be fired.