Tuesday, March 19, 2019

Thanks For The Help

I have a buddy. I love the guy, known him since I was in kindergarden. How old are you when you are in kindergarden? 4? I've known this motherfucker my whole life. He's my homie, for realz. Love the guy, no homo.

This motherfucker sends me a video the other day about 'finding your soulmate'. It's a video by an orthodox rabbi. I think. I didn't actually watch it. Why would I? You get into the Game to kill the version of you who believed in Disney.

No, what pissed me off about it was the fact that he outed himself as Just Not Getting It when he sent me the video. He still believes you (me) can find a soulmate. He believes this shit. And now I have to look at this cat, who I love as a brother, and decide whether I should burst his bubble or not.

You know, you get a little good with girls and you start to see reality a little differently. Like in the Matrix movie when the guy can see the code. That's what it's like, you see humans interacting and you see the code behind the surface, not the surface. The surface is lies, the code is the truth. So you see that shit, and it changes you, and you have to decide: should I let my homie in on it?

Am I any happier now that I can 'see the code'? No. I get laid a hell of a lot more, but so what? As a great man said, pussy is only a thing if  you aren't getting it. If you are getting it, it's...it's fucking annoying. I hate to say that but it's true. I don't even know if pussy is worth it. Is this hell?

Why would I want to to do that to my homie? Why would I want to take away Disney from him? It is a better world. It may be fake and made up and not reality, but who cares? My world is real and it fucking sucks. Well that's not true. The loss of the illusion is what sucks. As a man you do want to view women a certain way, and when you know, then you know, and you can't view them in that way anymore.

If I'm actually his friend, I wouldn't wreck the illusion.


I went out on the weekend, even though I told myself I wouldn't, and I picked up a young thing. I only did it because some other chick I wanted to fuck told me to die in a fire. Fuck you, Melissa. So I showed her what a cunt she was by picking up some 20 year old and taking her to my home, slapping the handcuffs on her, and going to town.

I think I bought her an uber at like 4 am. Wouldn't even let her stay. I sent the 'you can't say I raped you if you respond to this' text ("Hey I had a great time hanging out last night") about 5 minutes after she left. Didn't respond to her response ("Yeah had a fun time").

She sent me a text on Monday, complaining about how I choked her so hard I left red marks. She didn't like being choked, she said. Bitch, you came when I choked you. Fuck you. Women, amirite?

Just text me back and tell me I'm funny, Melissa.

Tuesday, March 12, 2019

Feel Good Story Of The Century

I'm in awe of this man.

My last three girl... I don't have girlfriends...what do you call a chick you sleep with for like a month and then get rid of? Whatever those are called, my last three of those have been 18, 19, and 21. Just so you know the appreciation I have for Mr. DiCaprio.

But even I have fucked a 30 year old or two in my time. Hats off to you sir.

(BTW, and I think I have said this before, I don't find much different in the pussy of different races. And I'm a racist so I'd note the pussy differences. You all know my love for Hindu's and I like the colour of the pink against the darker skin, but all pussy is pink. No, the difference in pussy comes from one thing, and that is age. And obviously younger pussy is better than older pussy).

Wednesday, February 27, 2019

How Do You Find Meaning With Women?

There is something that happens when you start learning girls. As you get better at it, as you learn there are certain techniques that you can do to raise your chances with them, as you start using the same script with different women and it still works, you start not liking women as much as you did when you started. It's called 'the seducers paradox'. You still like pussy, but you lose, how do I put it...you lose the ability to fall in love.

And why wouldn't you? You start 'automating' the process of love, that is, you start developing 'systems' towards women, you are going to start seeing them as 'automatons' or just parts in the system. It dehumanizes them to you. If I do X, she'll do Z. Further, you start to develop theories towards women's behaviour, and it makes them seem like a puzzle, a problem to solve, and not a real human.

It's not to say that you start seeing them as objects, but you stop seeing them as unique. To be more clear, you develop a mindset of "Every woman is like every other woman." Now, when we first started off in this game, you would never have thought that. Every woman was unique, and the one you liked was special.

How do you get back to that mindset without sacrificing your seduction abilities? Is it even possible?

I learned women because I wasn't getting any. I wanted to have sex more frequently than I was having it. That was my initial goal in this thing. Then I wanted to have sex with lots of different women. Then I wanted to have sex with lots of different hot women. Ok. Mission accomplished. Now what?

You know what I want now? It's cheesy as fuck, but I want to be able to fall in love. Wouldn't it be nice to be with a woman for more than 3 months and not be bored with her? Or to have her tell me something personal and actually care? These are nice things. I know in the community these things are laughed at, and there is a reason for that, but lets take a step back. These are nice things.

I don't think I'll ever reach a triple digit notch count. When I started, truly, my goal was to at least get a double digit notch count. And I mean now I can go double digits in a year. So mission accomplished. But I'm...I don't want to say I'm not any happier, because that would be a lie. It is a thrill to be able to go up to a hot chick in public and get them to dig you enough that they give you their number at the worst or sleep with you at the best. It isn't lame. But...it's not fulfilling anymore. Maybe it never was.

I'd like to get back to being able to like a woman, genuinely. It's not just on me, I will say the current culture is poison for women and it does contribute, for me at least, an unwillingness to commit. But it is a two way street. There are things for me to work on on my end.

I have a friend who has a 'girlfriend'. It's in square quotes because she isn't real, that is, she isn't located anywhere near him. She lives on the west coast and he lives in the prairies. They met on the internet, and as far as I know have never met in real life. I would not rate this a great relationship using my metrics, but I look at my friend and you know what I see? I see a man that is happy. I'm jealous of that. I may get laid more, but I'm not any happier for it.

He sent me a video of a Rabbi talking about how to find your soul mate. The very concept of the soul mate is the type of thinking that you kill when you want to get good at girls. So I thought it was quaint, but you know what, I think I'm going to watch it.

I'm probably just getting old.

Monday, February 25, 2019

Calgary Flames Raised Season Ticket Prices And Didn't Even Trade For A Winger At The Deadline

I'm totally not mad at having my tickets price raised 10%.

I'm totally not mad the Flames didn't sell a draft pick or two for a NHLer who can score more than Frolic or Bennett can. Totally not mad.

Friday, February 22, 2019

I Picked Up A 21 Year Old Hottie At The Snoop Dogg Concert Last Night

Settle in children and let me begin to regale you with a tale that will give you a grin...

So I'm at the Snoop Dogg concert yesterday. I have been busy all week so I was feeling tired, worn out, just gray. But I had never seen the D O Double G in concert and I'm of that age so I forced myself to go. I just went with my brother.

The concert was at the Dome. There were four acts, Korrupt, Warren G, Bone Thugs, and Snoop. Between the acts, there would be 10 - 15 minutes of 'intermission'. My seats were in 218, and I was sitting in row 12, which is mid row. That's the scene.

Sitting in the front row of section 218 are two very hot chicks. At least 8's, maybe higher depending on your scale. They are dancing with each other and having a good time, and are dressed like they want attention. And they are getting it; as I looked around the section I noticed most of the men were looking at these two girls. However, nobody was approaching them.

The first act ended and intermission starts. I sit in my spot and watch these girls, and I watch these guys watching these girls. What I was looking for is, basically, if these chicks were with boyfriends or dates. So I'm watching, and like I said above, no guy approaches them. I make the mental note, intermission ends and I watch the next act, Warren G I think.

Warren G ends and the next intermission starts. Warren G bored me out of my skull, so I need to do something, you know? I look at my brother and I bet him I can go get the number of at least one of the two hot chicks. He laughs. It's on. And I'll be real, as much as I like pussy and hot chicks, the main emphasis for me to take a shot at these girls was to a) show my brother I could and b) to do it in front of the whole section, so all the guys who were looking at them but not approaching would see it. Don't judge me, but that's the truth. Total ego play.

Before I go my brother suggests I use "what's your favourite snoop song" as an opener, which would have been terrible. I have no idea how he gets any girls using lines like that. Never use shit like that. 100 people before you have. Don't be boring.

So like I said, it's intermission, and I go from my spot and walk up to the hotties. As I walk up I can feel the eyes of the crowd on me. Showtime. And you know what, when I was walking up to them I was thinking about what I should say, and when I got there I just dropped it and went full improv. But I think I discovered a great opener and routine to do, which I want to share with you guys, because I think we should share what works.

The opener I used was, and I'm quite proud of this one, "Hey girls, do you want to hear my best opener?"

Now, an opener is only as good as the bantz behind it, and I can bantz. After they of course said they wanted to hear my best opener, I walked them through a routine I would do to them "if I was attracted to one of you" (another killer line if I do say so myself). I actually used the 'Best Friend' game routine, which has to be 15 years old now. But these chicks hadn't heard it (another reason to hit on young chicks, your old material is new to them).

My game was tight, and I'm joking with these girls when the next act started. Some of you would have tried to spend the concert with these girls, but I'm not a rookie. I used the starting of the act to do a take away. I told the girls I had to get back to my seat, and they actually said 'don't leave' which was nice, and then they said 'please come back later', which was also very nice. But I said I don't know how late I'd be staying, and was there a way we could continue this conversation later? The girls laughed and said 'come back and maybe you can get our numbers'. I said maybe, and I went to leave, but I saw that people were looking at me, so I said to the girls 'before I go, give me a kiss' and they actually did, they both kissed my cheeks at the same time kinda thing.

I was very pleased with myself. As I walked back up to my seats I saw guys looking at me. The double kiss had been for the benefit of the viewing crowd. But kisses on the cheeks are not numbers. How do I get these chicks numbers without looking like a stalker now?

I sat and watched the rest of the concert with my brother, while keeping an eye on the girls. Sometimes they would look up and give me the 'come here' finger gesture, but I didn't bite. I pretended I didn't notice them, I was having a good time without them. Obviously I'm spending the whole time thinking about how to smoothly re-engage to get the numbers.

I don't think what I did was brilliant or anything, but simple is good sometimes. All I did was wait for them to leave after the concert was done, and then I timed my exit so that I would walk by them 'naturally' as they were leaving their seats. So as people are leaving their seat section and spilling into the concourse, I 'just happen' to get to the concourse right after the girls get there, so that I am behind the girls.

It is not ideal to approach a woman from behind. So what did I do? I did the six year old thing of tapping one on the right shoulder while I stood to their left. Here's where I really get proud of myself. The girl I tapped on the shoulder looks to her right, see's her friend,  then looks to the left, and see's me, but I'm not looking at her. However I do have a big grin on my face, kinda letting her know that of course it was me. And she was cool because she gave me my next open, she smiled and then gave me a punch on the arm.

Mana from heaven. As soon as she punched me on the arm I knew I was good. I have a routine for that. I yelled 'ouch ouch ouch' and then told her that that was harassment. She actually said "What are you going to do about it, arrest me?" and here is what I did, and I'm proud of the boldness: I grabbed her arms and put them behind her back and went "citizens arrest, citizens arrest". Now, keep in mind I'm in the middle of the concourse, full of people.

It was a total power move, and I think it was what got me her number, ultimately. Anyway, I'm walking her through the crowd with her arms behind her, and the other friend mentions something about handcuffs. I tell the girls that handcuffs are a third date thing, and I prefer to use the leather restraints on girls, but I only do that to girls I like. But I can't get to a third date unless I have a first. Listen, it was a lame segue, but what else was I going to say?

I let the girl go as we have to walk down stairs. She asks me my name (never give out your name, always wait for the girl to ask it) which was a hint to me that I was doing ok. I tell her my name and I don't ask for hers. She tells me her name. I told her I didn't believe it, it sounded fake. We get to the bottom of the stairs and her friend tries to drag her away. I totally called the friend out on it, telling her not to cock block me when I was so close the finish line. The girl I'm working laughs at that, tells me "oh, you're close to the finish are you?" and I said "I mean you were about to give me your number before your friend rudely interrupted." and she laughed. She told me to hurry up because she had a ride waiting for her, and gave me her number.

Boom. Number closed a hottie I just met at the Snoop Dogg concert, with most of the flirting being done out in public (which I think most guys hate doing, so I was proud that I did it without getting too scared).

Now you can't fuck a number, but I am still pretty pleased with myself. She's the hottest chick I've ever picked up in public like that, and to do it in front of a bunch of people does boost one's ego a little. I found out later she is 21, which you know I like, being old and whatnot.

Moral of the story: "Do you want to hear my best opener" is a good opener, so far, and if you are having trouble initiating conversation with girls, try it out.

PS: It's also the first time I have gotten a chicks info at the Saddledome since they got rid of the smoke pit.

Wednesday, February 13, 2019

Remember, If You Sign An Organ Donor Card, The Doctors Will Kill You

Kids, if you sign anything with the authorities that says that when you die you'd like them to harvest your organs, the doctors or paramedics or whoever will kill you when they get the chance. 

The organs are valuable. They will let you die so they can get them. Don't sign the organ donor card. 

Stay woke.