There is something that happens when you start learning girls. As you get better at it, as you learn there are certain techniques that you can do to raise your chances with them, as you start using the same script with different women and it still works, you start not liking women as much as you did when you started. It's called 'the seducers paradox'. You still like pussy, but you lose, how do I put it...you lose the ability to fall in love.
And why wouldn't you? You start 'automating' the process of love, that is, you start developing 'systems' towards women, you are going to start seeing them as 'automatons' or just parts in the system. It dehumanizes them to you. If I do X, she'll do Z. Further, you start to develop theories towards women's behaviour, and it makes them seem like a puzzle, a problem to solve, and not a real human.
It's not to say that you start seeing them as objects, but you stop seeing them as unique. To be more clear, you develop a mindset of "Every woman is like every other woman." Now, when we first started off in this game, you would never have thought that. Every woman was unique, and the one you liked was special.
How do you get back to that mindset without sacrificing your seduction abilities? Is it even possible?
I learned women because I wasn't getting any. I wanted to have sex more frequently than I was having it. That was my initial goal in this thing. Then I wanted to have sex with lots of different women. Then I wanted to have sex with lots of different hot women. Ok. Mission accomplished. Now what?
You know what I want now? It's cheesy as fuck, but I want to be able to fall in love. Wouldn't it be nice to be with a woman for more than 3 months and not be bored with her? Or to have her tell me something personal and actually care? These are nice things. I know in the community these things are laughed at, and there is a reason for that, but lets take a step back. These are nice things.
I don't think I'll ever reach a triple digit notch count. When I started, truly, my goal was to at least get a double digit notch count. And I mean now I can go double digits in a year. So mission accomplished. But I'm...I don't want to say I'm not any happier, because that would be a lie. It is a thrill to be able to go up to a hot chick in public and get them to dig you enough that they give you their number at the worst or sleep with you at the best. It isn't lame. But...it's not fulfilling anymore. Maybe it never was.
I'd like to get back to being able to like a woman, genuinely. It's not just on me, I will say the current culture is poison for women and it does contribute, for me at least, an unwillingness to commit. But it is a two way street. There are things for me to work on on my end.
I have a friend who has a 'girlfriend'. It's in square quotes because she isn't real, that is, she isn't located anywhere near him. She lives on the west coast and he lives in the prairies. They met on the internet, and as far as I know have never met in real life. I would not rate this a great relationship using my metrics, but I look at my friend and you know what I see? I see a man that is happy. I'm jealous of that. I may get laid more, but I'm not any happier for it.
He sent me a video of a Rabbi talking about how to find your soul mate. The very concept of the soul mate is the type of thinking that you kill when you want to get good at girls. So I thought it was quaint, but you know what, I think I'm going to watch it.
I'm probably just getting old.