Thursday, March 22, 2018

Flames Suck

This girl. At this point it's pathetic. But she has my brain wormed. And it's not like I'm not seeing other girls. And it isn't like I'm also not seeing other girls. You know what I mean? But whatever. I'm sick of the topic. Let me write something about the Flames that you already know.

They suck.

That's it. No analysis. No stats or anything fancy. I'm a season ticket holder. I have to go sit in my shitty seats and watch this shitty team and drink in the shitty Dome atmosphere, potentially, 41 times a year. I think I went to 20 games, max, this year. It's probably lower. Fuck this shit. Losing sucks.

When you lose more games at home than you win, what is the fucking point of the ticket? I'm not going to not renew, but holy shit did this season kill something in my fandom. Hyping this team like it was something special and then having them basically quit on the season for large portions of's not good. It's not cute. It's fucking bullshit, is what it is.

Obviously the coaching staff should get fired. People who try to fiddle with that should be ridiculed harshly. Who gives a fuck. The team, pretending they were in must win games, has not shown up to play. That's them not giving a fuck about the coach. They don't give a fuck about the coach because the coach doesn't publicly embarrass them. It's as simple as that. Don't you people fucking get it?

The players are shit, too. The C should be stripped off of Gio's sweater. The only guy who comes off as giving a shit is the very young Mr. Tkachuk, or however you spell that kids name. Good player. One of the only likeable players on the team, from a fan perspective. Give him the C. Mr. John Hockey also has some passion. Put an A on his sweater if he doesn't already have one. The other A can go to Gio. Anyone but Brouwer. Fuck these guys.

And how do you fix Brouwer? I'd play him with 13. That way you will at least get some production out of him. Who else could you stick him with that could lift him up? Monahan (is that how you spell his name? I don't even remember he is so invisible)? Yeah fucking right. 23 should be split from 13 anyways. If the kid is a player, let him play on his own. I'd trade him. There, I said it.

13+39. 23+19. 11+whatever number frolik is. 77+93. That's how I'd make the lines. Then you slot the remaining guys into the remaining slots. 13+39 might not work because they don't have a centre. Sign Tavares.

They should buy 39 out anyways. That's the real truth. Is this team committed to winning or not? If it was committed to winning they would gas the coaching staff, sign a coach with a name, and buyout Brouwer. Will they do that? Is anybody holding their breath?

The defence sucks. 27 has grown on me, I'd keep him. I like 5. Brodie and Hamonic and the rest of them are all hot garbage. I keep hearing we have a prosect or two on the farm that plays D. Why not trade Brodie and Hamonic (Harmonic? What is his fucking name? Travis?) and play these kid prospects. Free up cap space for Tavares. Or Kane. Or Karlsson. That's what I'd do.

In short, this team is fucked. But it's salvageable. It needs a new wardrobe though. Badly.

And fire the in game entertainment people. This shit has been boring and stale for the four years I have owned  season tickets.  


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