Thursday, September 15, 2011

Stuff That Happened

Alright, some housekeeping, and then some preening.

Housekeeping: We are still undecided on how to proceed with the season preview. It will probably come next week. And if not that, something will be up. We are sure of it.

Besides that...we may get more into 'battle-blogging', which is an awkward way to say we are going to slag on the other opposition teams more. Sports jingoism, it's what's for dinner.

Anyways, on to the preening.

So, Dome Beers, anything happen over the summer?

Fuck yes something happened.

1) Peter Loubardias got fired.

This was wonderful news for anybody with taste. And it actually occurred while we were in the desert paradise that is Arizona, making it even more of a beautiful moment. You know what? We are going to let ya'll in.

So we are in Arizona, which is really a very gorgeous state, especially for those of us pretend urban cowboys. Wide open spaces, intense sun, dazzling coloured foothills (which the folk down there call 'mountains', which is cute) and tanned California-girls turned economic refugees. Also, a litre of gin goes for $9.99 American pesos. It's about as close to heaven as one can get with a pulse.

Obviously, we were enjoying ourselves down there. We spent the first couple of days down there drinking and lounging by the pool. It's nice, relaxing, nothing much going on. The hours pass, as does sobriety.

Now it is getting late. We are in no state to go anywhere. Dinner is delivered. A new excuse to drink. After dinner, baseball on tv. A new excuse to drink. After baseball, time to go swimming again. Another excuse to drink. After swimming, hot tub. Drinking.

At this point in the evening, we very well may have been slightly inebriated. People are passing out. It's bed time for Gonzo. But it isn't. It is only like 12 o clock. As people depart for their rooms, we are left by our drunk lonesome to continue drinking. Nobody likes to drink alone, and as we ourselves are contemplating going to bed, we log onto twitter to see what the haps.

Did we say we were drunk yet? We mention it only because when we log onto twitter, the most wonderful news in the entire world greets us: Peter Loubardias out at SNET.

What? Impossible. We are drunk. We are so drunk we have started to hallucinate. We rub our eyes, and look again. The news hasn't rubbed away. 'This can't be true' we think to ourselves. We take another shot of whatever firewater was on hand. News is still there. We grab some tequila, and not blue agave, but bad, cheap tequila, the kind one uses to strip the paint from ones walls. One, two, three go down the hatch. We are fucking awake and alert now, and will be until the shots hit the blood. Check back at the computer screen, and like the writing on Belshazzar's wall, the glorious message is still there, plainly visible for all to see: Peter Loubardias out at SNET.

Domebeer-aholics, we will admit that at this moment, our inner 12 year old girl came out. We screamed like one of them do when they see Justin Bieber. 'Everyone, wake the fuck up!' although at this point, it probably sounded like 'E'ryun, wak fuk uuuuuuuuuuuup!'

As the drunken will do, an investigation was quickly held. To this day, SNET still has a profile page up for Loubardias (which speaks to how un-thorough the people who run SNET are, but that is a topic for another day), so that was no help to us. We can't remember who broke the story, the Dowbiggin tweet or a blog post, or perhaps it was a blog posting about Dowbiggin tweeting. Whatever it was, we found some confirmation.

Which meant it was time to celebrate. Which meant more drinking. Which is why our livers hate Peter Loubardias.

And, for the record, we would have hired Jermain Franklin to be the next PBP guy. Kerr hasn't even been on the job for a month and he has already recorded the worst PBP you will hear all year: 'Whacking, whacking, whacking'.

2) Ken King is GM has started bleeding over into mainstream commentary.

Yeah. That was nice. It means that not only are people listening to us, we were able to persuade them. Winning!

The best part of the bleed over is that the MSM know that there is a community of readers out there who don't buy the organization's sanctioned BS, and the more open we are about talking about Ken King as GM, the more open the MSM will be towards exploring the situation. That's the theory, at least.

Also, we apparently got 'red-flagged' by the organization, who knows what the fuck that means. And told to us by people in the media, no less! That was a big old gold star for us as well.

So, for the blog in general, it was a good summer.

*PS: To all of those who sent us hatemail, thank you. It's a good life, having idiots hate you, and all that.

Furthermore, I think Peter Loubardias Ken King should be fired.

1 comment:

  1. Dude, Jermain Franklin, why didn't I think of that? Short of performing a seance and hiring zombie Ed Whalen, I can't think of a better option.

    Can you go into more detail into this "red flag" thing? It kinda sounds awesome.

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