Wednesday, March 2, 2011

That Is What We Are Talking About

Boat races are fun, eh? Especially when you are on the right side of one.

The Blues are a bad team. The Flames treated them like they were a bad team. That makes us happy.

But wow, let's talk about the Blues for a second. They got shut out twice by the same team in about 3 days? Wow, how awful. And let's put it into a little perspective: the Flames rock Bad(ish)suck(ing-less-then-he-was-before) and Staios as our 5-6 D-pair. We leave #33 and #40 out on the points during power plays. That isn't exactly 'shut down' defence; you can score on those players and those formations.

Well, not the Blues, apparently. There was even a sequence in the game where Stewart has the puck spitting distance from the net, nobody around him, and he takes a big ass slap shot. He is less than 5 feet from the goalie. And Kipper calmly just puts up his glove hand and snatches the puck, which must have been traveling at a million miles an hour. You know what that is? That's getting dunked on, but one of them poster dunks. Miikka dunked on Stewart. Stewart should have been forced to skate off the ice and go enjoy the rest of the game from the locker room.

Stewart wasn't the only Blue to be postered and embarrassed last night, though. Which fan one the contest to play in net for the Blues last night? Bishop, that the cats name? You are not an NHL goalie, Mr. Bishop. Nice of the Blues to employ you though, helped the Flames out. Wonder if Jarome is going to buy the guy dinner?

For reals, people. BMo is skating the puck up on the wing, staring at Jarome for like 30 feet, it's a two on one on paper, but the idiot Blues defender doesn't commit to Jarome or BMo so passing lanes galore are open, BMo takes advantage of that by sliding the puck over to Jarome, who has been skating up the ice with his stick up in the air and already has his feet set up to unleash a one-timer, and the rec league goalie the Blues were putting on the ice doesn't cheat over to Jaromes side? Do you know #12 is a Hall Of Famer, Mr. Bishop? We bet you know now.

Whoever taught Bishop his technique should be embarrassed. That's all we are going to say about that. Whoever decided that this cat was good enough to play in the best hockey league in the world is the guy who should shoulder the blame.

Anyways, that's how you are suppose to treat bad teams. Good on the Flames for doing so.
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What else did we want to talk about...

Fuck, Diane Francis's precious little baby boy had an interesting tidbit in his column the other day:

"But perhaps the most exciting development for the organization Monday is the fact that there was a war room: A fully catered meeting of the minds that featured several prominent scouts, advisors, president Ken King and a few others openly exchanging information and ideas on how the Flames could best proceed."

Holy shit. Holy fucking shit. That's not true, is it? Tell me the guy who is responsible for selling jerseys is not in on decisions that effect the hockey operations side of the business, a part of the business that one Kenneth King knows nothing about at all? Tell me that's a typo right? Because if it isn't, that aignt good. It's even worse that Diane Francis's little boy is writing about this situation like it is a good thing.

Quick question: What the hell did Ken King know about hockey in the years before he hired Darryl? Nothing? Oh, that's interesting. And then what did Ken King know about hockey in the years he employed Darryl? Oh, that's right! As every ink stained scribe keeps telling us, Darryl was Caesar and made all the decisions himself. That means Ken King wasn't included. That means Ken King didn't know shit about hockey while Darryl was employed here! And all of a sudden Ken King, Feaster, and the rest of the Sutters palace coup Darryl, and lo and behold Ken King is in the war room, not as an observer, but as a participant!

Were the Flames in deep discussions about trading jerseys? Ticket packages? Broadcast rights? Lobbying angry phone calls to the local radio station? Because if they were, then fine, let King into the room. But we have a sneaking suspicion that wasn't going on in the war room on trade deadline day.

This has big implications. Were certain moves, like trading a Glencross who is demanding a five year term to resign, not done because Ken King was concerned about the image of the team following a move like that? Who had the final say, Ken King or Feaster? Was Ken King in the room as the owners representative? Did Feaster have any real authority on trade deadline day?

Look, the Flames tell us, the fans, all the time that they are in it to win it. They then go out and insert the companies salesman into the hockey operations on the trade deadline. Why?

And why weren't these questions even asked? Look, we don't talk about the CONFLICT OF INTEREST that exists between, say the FAN960 (who pay for the rights to broadcast the games, and because they do get enhanced media access) and the Calgary Flames. Or Eric Francis and Ken King. But we are going to start talking about it a lot more if mouth breather pieces like this keep coming out. Either you are a salesman, or you are a journalist.And if you ask us, there are an awful lot of salesmen in this city.

Maybe ya'll missed this in school: a journalist is suppose to be a skeptic.
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On this skeptic stuff, the tone of the post deadline coverage, where everybody had the same point, made it smell a little like the media is getting talking points straight from the organization.

Jay Feaster (Or Ken King, or whoever was in charge) had three options. He (whomever 'he' was) could have traded the UFA's to recoup assets, could have continued with the status quo, or could have added a player for the cup run.

There are pro's and cons to each of these three scenarios. Feaster (we are assuming it was him but who knows with this organization) chose to go the status quo route. Fine. But for the media to come out en masse and suck his dick over that? A little disappointing. Nobody wanted to show a spine and write about how a team who is constantly panned for overspending on free agents and not having any prospects missed an opportunity to recoup a shit load of prospects by trading away it's UFA's at the deadline? Nobody?

BMo, Babchuk, Glencross, Tangs. These are good players, but more importantly, they are good players who are on cheap contracts. That means they provide what we like to call 'surplus utility'. Because they are UFA's, they will get raised next year. There 'surplus utlity' will be eaten up, because they will be paid market rates. We all love Glencross when he makes 1.2 million. Do you love love love him when he is making 3 million and signed for 5 years? Same with Tangs. Tangs at 1.7 million provides a ton of value. Tangs at 3 provides value, but not very much compared to his cap hit.

The team is on a roll and they are going to try and make a run. Fine, that's not the issue. The issue is that that wasn't the only move a reasonable person could have made. The other moves that could have taken place are worthy of discussion. Nobody in the MSM wanted to talk about it? Strange.

And you just know when the draft comes around the MSM are going to be bitching about the fact the Flames have no draft picks.
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Great news on the 'Saddledome Plays Shitty Music' front. The morning guys are starting to make fun of it, Rhett Warrener is starting to make fun of it, Live! On Air, which means that critical mass is building. The techno crew who took over the 'dome production are getting it from all sides, and you know that because Ken King listens to the FAN960 to make sure they don't knock the team, he heard that.

Pink slips cannot be very far. And what a wonderful development that would be.

We are going to get sexists on you all here. Not to be mean, we love women, but seriously, who is running the music, a woman? That isn't even fair. A girl, not a woman, is running the music, right? The techno goal song, the techno intermission, the techno TV timeouts...it's a girl who likes to dance, who likes the clubs. But the Saddledome is not a fucking club. Keep that dance music the fuck out, unless they are doing a dance contest during intermission.

Get your boyfriend to take you out, music director. The Saddledome has an organ, right? You want to pay techno, play it on the organ. Hell, everything should be from the organ, but if they are going to run a playlist, put some fucking cheesy 80's rock on. Guitar rifts work at a hockey game, pop-electric-music...not so much.

And if it isn't a girl who is running the music, if it's a man, then that man needs to hand in his man card, because his uterus is showing.

Also, play some country music. Haggard, please.
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There was something else we wanted to hit on, but it has slipped from our mind.

Well this is awkward...

Furthermore, I think Peter Loubardias should be fired.

2 comments:

  1. Blah blah blah

    DB, who is that left side defender?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Please play Five Finger Death Punch.

    ReplyDelete