Tuesday, March 8, 2011

I Hate This Commercial

This is stupid:

Right? Fucking stupid, excuse us.

Let's get out the scalpel. We see this white dude on an airline, and we see this Asian lady, looks like a Korean airline lady (from the uniform she has on, but who knows, it's not important anyways). Whitey hits the 'Stewardess come flirt with me' button, the stewardess comes over, and then blam, the first bit of stupid is introduced to the scenario.

The lady comes over to the man and asks him what's wrong. IN ASIAN!

What? Let's assume this is Korean Air. Korean Air employees speak fucking English. Furthermore, they are trained to talk to fat Americans (and notice we are assuming he is American because he is fat, like any good Korean Air stewardess would have done) in English!

Fuck that pisses me off. Let's continue.

After addressing her customer, who is fat and white and definitely not Asian, in Asian, Whitey points to what looks to be a childs book. The page Whitey points to has a single thing sprawled across the barren white of its page: a picture of a man clearly holding his back. What's more is there are words accompanying this picture. In English, the words 'Back Pain' are written, and immediately underneath the Asian translation. Whitey points to this picture, shows it to the stewardess, and says "Do you have something for pain?"

That's cool, that's alright. Nothing to get upset about with this little bit of scene setting. But then the commercial doesn't end eight seconds in. You see, the stewardess hands the man over a package of Bayer brand aspirin. Shit hits the fan.

Whitey looks on the package of Bayer aspirin with pure disgust, before turning to the Asian stewardess who has spoken to him in Asian, and to whom he is speaking to with the aid of an illustrated translation book for children, which means he should have no expectation she can speak any English whatsoever, and explains to her, in English, a language he believes she cannot speak, that "No, no , no, I'm not having a heart attack; it's my back!"

What? First off, does Whitey think the Asian stewardess is unable to read and understand that stupid childs English to Asian (look I don't know if it's Korean or not for sure, ok?) translation picture book? The words 'Back Pain' were written in Asian as well, and he showed her the book. Does Whitey think the woman is stupid? Secondly, "I'm not having a heart attack."? What the fuck is that shit? What the hell is Whitey thinking? That the stewardess is so callous that she would simply give aspirin to a man suffering from a heart attack and then nonchalantly continue on with her duties? It's a really stupid scene. But the commercial isn't over; let's see how these two wacky kids resolve this cute cultural impasse.

"Trust me, it works great for pain." Oh fucking snap exclaims the author of this post, that Asian can speak English! Damn son. For reals, yo. She was playing your ass, Whitey!

Oh Lord that was stupid. Let's just deal with 'Trust me'. Trust her? How can we or Whitey 'trust her'? She has spent the first 25 seconds of this commercial doing everything in her power to throw off a vibe that says 'Hey, fatty, I don't speak English', only to reveal now, deep into the relationship, that she actually does speak English, and not only that, but fluent English. How the fuck can Whitey trust you after you deceived him like this? I'm watching from my couch at home and I can't fucking trust you after that. 'Trust you'? I wouldn't trust you if I was having a heart attack!

Also, the stewardess...I'd hit that.

Furthermore, I think Peter Loubardias should be fired.


  1. When the youtube ends, I believe there is the option to watch 'Super Cool Korean Ice Cream'.

    I'd watch that.

  2. from worst, to best:

  3. But did u happen to notice the Korean in the commercial had a NICE BUT in that white skirt???

  4. The heck with the commercial, she has a phat booty son!