Monday, February 28, 2011

Dome Beers Trade Deadline Extravaganza

We were going to do a 'Great Hair Debate' today, like we did last year, probably on 'Public Sector Unions'.

But here is the thing. We went to the game yesterday, we drank our 'Dome beers, we had fun. We didn't prepare a 'Great Hair Debate' for today. If we were getting paid to make a deadline, we would have been fired.

We don't get paid, though, so it's all good. And we are sitting here at work and we have a choice to make. We could throw up something quick and dirty and call it a day. Lately, we seem to have been doing that a lot, and we think the quality of the site has suffered a bit. Not that it was of all that quality to begin with.

So we are going to be honest with you all. No gag or bits, or lameness.

Our opinion of this team is it's not good. Of the two camps, 'Believers' and 'Non-Believers', we, to our everlasting shame, lean towards the 'Non-Believer' camp'. They didn't beat Vancouver, they didn't beat Boston, and they didn't beat San Jose. Then, in a game they had to win to show they were not going same old same old, they sleepwalk through a contest with the Blues. And fuck Peter Maher for going on the radio and trying to sugar code the game with 'playoff atmosphere' platitudes. The Blues are a shitty team. The Flames let them hang around.

We're sorry, but that doesn't inspire confidence in us. Who are we? We aren't journalists, we are fans. Our opinion as fans of this team is that they are not good enough to provide us with legitimate grounds to hope for a Cup run. Hell, we aren't inspired enough to think these guys could get through the first round.

Seriously, San Jose boat races the team through the third period of that game, and shuts the team down in overtime (we could give a shit what happens in the shoot-out; it's fake). They needed, for us to believe, to come out and force their will on the Blues. Instead, the Flames came out and decided that because they were wearing a red jersey they were going to win. That's a bad habit of the 14th place team. It shows complacency. Do you know how hungry you have to be to win the Stanley Cup?

Sorry, we don't get the feeling the team is hungry. Instead of making a statement at home against a team you can bury, they play a boring game. They could have lost that game too, the way they were playing. They only scored because of a lucky puck deflection got the puck to Moss in the first place. They blew a four minute power play, and even gave up shots against on it. This team is legitimate?

Don't see it, sorry. Sure, we can go mouth breather on you, squint real hard, and say 'Hey, we have a goalie, some solid blueliners, a few guys who can put the puck in the net, some solid bottom six forwards, we can make a run'. And who knows, maybe the hockey gods are squinting, too. But we see a shitty powerplay, that employs shitty tactics (hint, retards: You guys (the Flames) are not skilled enough to set up a half court offense. MOVE YOUR FUCKING FEET). We see uninspired 5 on 5 play complete with soft passes in our own zone. We see a team that plays to the level of it's competition. We see fucking Matt Stajan.

But we are fans. This team has gone zombie and fought it's way back into the hunt. That cannot be dismissed. More than that, though, is the amount of money this team charges for tickets, and the amount of money season ticket holders have plunked down is a giant factor in keeping the hope alive. The organization owes it to those people to continue to compete for as high a seed as possible (as much as firebrands like ourselves would like to see the organization trade the UFA's).

Which means that despite all the talk about not wasting resources for the future, this team needs to waste resources for the future. The team has played 64 games, which is about two more than their competition. They are basically tied with 73, 72 points with the competition, and the competition has games in hand. The Flames lose every tie breaker. WE ARE NOT IN THE PLAYOFFS.

And we are not going to pretend that we are. But if everyone else is and we are not going to trade away BMo, Glencross, and Tangs, then this team needs to add. This team is not good enough. If it wants to get good enough, it needs to add. It needs to add a defencemen who can push Staios off the roster. They need to replace Hagman with a player who can actually play a role effectively. We would love it if they could replace Stajan with someone with a little more grit (anyone else see him spin away from a check during the game yesterday and cause a turnover, instead of taking the hit to move the puck into the opposition zone?). If they could move Bourque and his term off the team for a better player (say Bourque, some prospect and a draft pick for Richards) we would love that, too. Keep Backlund, though. We like #11.

Whatever. Bottom line is Feaster should show he has some balls, fuck the media firestorm that will come, and trade the first rounder if he can get a real player for it. This team needs to get better if it is even going to have a chance to beat Vancouver, Detroit, San Jose, Boston, Philly, or whoever. It does, and you all know it. We wanted the GM to blow the team up before it came to this, but he didn't. That was the organizations decision. Now that the team didn't die on the vine, it owes it to the players, to the fans, to the season ticket holders, to improve the team and give it a legitimate chance. Because as the roster looks right now, it doesn't have one.

Fuck the draft pick. This team drafts Chucko's in the first round. We find players in the 3rd round and later. Trade the first rounder, pay the price, and improve the team, Feaster and Edwards. You waited too long to to do anything else.

Feed the Zombie.
...

If the Flames do listen to us and do anything, we will update the page with our thoughts.

UPDATE NUMBER ONE

Picked up a blue liner, Carson, on waivers. Yawn. Wake us up when they get a real NHLer.

UPDATE NUMBER TWO

 Fred Modin can now take Hagmans place in the lineup. Hurray, all our problems are solved!

UPDATE NUMBER THREE

Yeah, that's a girl offering to play grab ass with your humble correspondent in the comment sections. A Z R wins the trade deadline.  

Furthermore, I think Peter Loubardias should be fired.

14 comments:

  1. We should hang out. I'll buy a round and grab your ass.

    This is great work, barring the spelling, grammar and punctuation errors. I ignore them because I appreciate your thought processes.

    I've been hearing the 'oh, aren't you eating crow now' with the Flames on a run.

    No. I'm not. And why not? Because the defence's lack of speed was exposed against the Bruins.

    What do I get? Well, yeah, but they're *close* games.

    Bottom line, they're losses. And they don't have the legs to sustain a series against the better teams in this league.

    The fist fucking has to end and the real talk has to be heard.

    This. Is. Not. A. Good. Team.

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  2. CHANGE. YOUR. GIRLS.

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  3. Poor grammar and punctuation is part of DB's charm. I'm positive that I would probably do much, much worse if I was posting this many words a week.

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  4. Hines Ward on DWTS?
    Your Steelers are a bitch crew!

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  5. The Flames have 5 wins against "elite" teams:
    San Jose: 1
    Philly: 1 - SO
    Vancouver: 1 - SO
    Chicago: 2

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  6. I just choked on my tea. Just because Chicago is the defending Cup champion doesn't make the Blackhawks an elite team this season.

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  7. And by the way, there are no shootouts in the playoffs. The Flames will need to uncover a whole lot of speed, stamina and skill to survive lengthy overtimes.

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  8. Elite was in quotations... figured grammar geeks would notice...

    Also: Sheen = Jeff Hardy = No Respect

    Anon

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  9. The Players dont owe the fans shit. The team came back from the dead. Its time for the fans to get alittle more vocal. Was also @ the St.Louis game and the lower bowl was quite empty. STEP IT UP FLAMES FANS ITS THE STRETCH RUN!! I distinctly remember a fan base carry a team to the finals in 03-04, could be wrong. Also, Harvey is doing a bad job. I know its this ones rookie year (i think) but this dude needs to stop schmoozing with kids, and start getting fans into the game.
    Bottom line, Flames doing a good job, (just get to the 2nd round!), Fans: YOU ARE BAND WAGONERS, STOP IT! Quick fact: The team has been here more then 8 years, Owners: STOP BEING CHEAP, and PUT THE TEAM OVER THE TOP (oops its too late)

    !!!GO FLAMES GO, ALL THE WAY TO THE FINALS!!!

    FUCK YOU DB GUY!!!

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  10. DH

    DB writes that he wants the team to trade its first round pick so that it can get more firepower and make a run in the playoffs, which is your point, and you tell 'fuck you'?

    What up with that?

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  11. Anyone who doesn't believe in the team is on the shit list. Blind Faith is what we need, not objectivity. Fans need it step it up cuz the owners didn't, that includes Harvey to DB. In the words of my boy R-Truth: That's what's up!

    To be clear Fans give players adrenaline. Adrenaline gives players turbo. Turbo = ASS KICKING of the opposition, which ='s Stanley.

    You fake fans don't know what happens when we make it to round 2 with #99 not around.

    Also: Epic Raw last night.

    !!!GO FLAMES GO, ALL THE WAY TO THE FINALS!!!

    FUCK YOU ANON!!!

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  12. I think you should have to be at least 18 and have an IQ of at least 75 to post comments on blogs.

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  13. But then you'd have to go to flames nation...

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