Thursday, February 4, 2010

Alls Quiet On The Western Front

Well, Domebeers came out for Phaneuf, and he gets traded. So knowing our luck over here, once this gets posted Ilya will have been traded. Who will we obsess about then? I hate to say it, it hurts my very soul to even consider it, but the only names that really excite me are a couple of the assholes from that Tampa Bay team that stole the cup from us. Brad ‘House on Fire’ Richards and My Cousin Vinnie.

Fuck no, has it really come to this? Either option still has that ginormous price tag, just like Ilya. The difference is that we can sign Ilya without giving anything up, but to get on of those two centres we will have to trade some assets. Dear reader, you’re asking what assets we have that would be of interest to TB or Dallas? The one the Calgary Flames have in spades, thanks to this fanbase: Cash.

I don’t know if you are aware of this, but if you reach into your pocket, and you pull out, say a 5 dollar bill, then you, amigo, have more money in your hand then Tom Hicks does. That’s right, you have more cash on hand then the guy who owns the Rangers, the Stars, and something called Liverpool that plays some sort of kickball game back in the old country.

Tampa Bay ownership isn’t much better. In fact, who owns TB? The team of jokers they currently have as owners apparently have so much 12 year old girl in them that they can’t even talk to each other, which makes date night awkward, no doubt. They also don’t have any money. There was a report that they did indeed trade Vinnie to Montreal, (What, pray tell, is a montreal?) but that Bettman killed it. Black hearted monster, that guy is.

So the teams with some centres, Dallas and TB, are cash poor. We are ‘good-hockey-player’ poor, but we do have cash. To the best of my knowledge, you can’t trade cash considerations. Fuck. But you can give them cap relief in the form of ‘your 10 million dollar hockey player for a bag of pucks and some tickets to watch Glencross play cowboy at the rodeo’ type of trade. Hey man, don’t scoff, those rodeo tickets are hard to get.

I actually would prefer Ilya over Vinnie or Richards. I think we could make Backlund a very good player if he got to pass to Ilya and Jarome for the next 5 years. Whatever happens, it’s pretty clear that it’s about high time we got Jarome another thoroughbred to play with.

Furthermore, I think Peter Loubardias should be fired.


  1. How Waddell keeps his job is beyond me:

  2. Why does Domebeers even tempt fate.

    Hicks said that he may sell the Dallas stars today (We call it divestment in the industry), which, of course, would mean that the new owner may have cash and Richards is not available. Also, I know Hicks sold the Rangers to Nolan Ryan. I kept it in the line for arts sake. Dont like it? Kill yourself.